Rejection

What more can a organ recipient ask for than 9.5 years of healthy rejection free life. The reality is rejection is real and even as far out and "safe" I knew deep down it too would happen to me to just didn't know when. I guess no one can really be prepared for rejection and what it does to our bodies. I certainly was not ready. Within 5-7 days of having some chest congestion I began to realize this was not a normal cold/cough. I had seen my local pulmonologist after just a couple days of getting my cough. He was arrogant and ignorant and his care plan put me in grave danger. I listened to my body and went over his head to my transplant team. My fev1 had dropped 35% and my entire body felt off. My husband got plane tickets that day and we flew across the country to my transplant center in Pittsburgh. I barely made the trip

And was admitted through the ER. Immediately they put me on IV antibiotics as well as inhaled.

I was shocked at how fast my body declined, I felt like I was dying. All the fears and emotions from

Before my transplant resurfaced a it was so incredibly hard to not break down..to stay strong and push foward. 

We watched Wonder Woman before heading back to Pittsburgh. I'm far from

Wonder Woman but I fight my battles head on and take on challenges placed before me with courage & hope. 

We've raised some money to help with all our travel & expenses at this time. The love & generosity people have shown to me is just amazing. I am such a blessed person to have my life filled with beautiful souls who wrap their love around me and give me strength to endure. 

Officially I'm in acute mild rejection. It's treatable and I will start the solumedral tomorrow -Sunday. I have my best friend and incredible husband by my side. I know God loves me & hears my prayers...this too shall pass. 

"I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee" 2 Kings 20:5

 

Working Again?!

So as my previous post mentioned I have started a part time job. I spent a lot of time "thinking" about whether it was something I wanted to do. Being post transplant it seems like every decision I make has to be weighed out on the "How will this effect my lungs?" scale. However, I've gotten to the point where I need something to help me feel like I am contributing.

Post transplant life is awesome 95% of the time. . .seriously. But there is a tiny bit that is hard (it might be more than 5% haha) There are times when I feel lost in a way. It's hard to explain, but I am sure other post transplant patients have probably experienced the feeling. "What Now?" I had dealt emotionally with the probability of my life coming to an end in 2007. I had to be prepared to accept that and so when I got a 2nd chance I feel like I was unprepared. I hadn't really planned that far ahead. It was all "what was happening RIGHT NOW" I dealt with what came at me minute by minute, day by day. Now I think about "what's happening tomorrow. . .next week. . .next month. . next year". . . Because I will live to see those.

It's been almost 4 years. I have done a lot of really cool things. I have my worries, I feel overwhelmed sometimes by my fear of "what if. . ." and my biggest fear of all "rejection", but living in fear is no way really LIVE. Therefore I have overcome those fears by doing things that perhaps my first instinct is to fear them. Which includes "Going Back to WORK". So far I am confident that I have made the right choice! Of course there is always going to be a little fear, but I feel the reward I get from feeling productive and building new relationships will outweigh any fears :)

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