I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears, behold I will heal thee.
2Kings 20:5

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

I feel lost. . . .

I have never been apart from my true love and best friend for more than just a couple weeks. . . I am going on my 3rd week away from him and I feel lost a little inside. I thought maybe it would make me feel better to dedicate this post to him, my soul mate and the only man who REALLY knows me.

Bryan is an amazing man. Each day I feel like I have something I don't know how I earned him. I am not just saying he's amazing, I have proof:

Things Bryan does WILLINGLY, and never complains~
1) Laundry. . . he even irons his own clothes
2) Dishes, without being asked
3) Cooks Dinner about 3-4 days out of the week
4) Tells me I am beautiful every day
5) Carried me when I was too sick to walk
6) Stayed by my bedside through a double lung transplant
7) Loves me just the way I am and puts no one above me~ even himself
8) Supports my interests and hobbies. .. from old VW bugs to my scrapbooking
9) He lets me talk and talk and talk and talk and never makes me feel like I should "shut up"
10) He Believes in Me! He encourages me, He is Honest with me, He loves me!
11) My Favorite quality of Bryan's is his sense of humor. . . .he makes me laugh every single day~

Love is a fabulous and complicated thing. I wasn't looking for love or marriage when I met Bryan, I had big plans of making it big in New York City. Love makes us do things that seem crazy or difficult. Love makes us better. Without love, what would be the point of living? Bryan was my reason to fight for my life. What else did I really have to fight for? But the thought of saying "goodbye" to him hurt worse than all the pain CF was causing me. Knowing Bryan would be alone, lost, sad and hurt pushed me through times even when giving up would have been easier. . . . I love Bryan more than myself. I cry when I think of what Bryan endured during my transplant, and I know he experienced many things that I wanted to save him from. He is the man of my dreams, he makes me happy. My heart still skips a beat after almost 11 years of marriage. How do we stay so in love?. . . . . we are each others best friend. There is no one else I would rather be with and he would say the same.

Save a life..."Be Someone's Hero"....Be an Organ Donor


Cammi said...

I love this post. SO SWEET. You're so blessed to have a soul mate with you always. Bryan is such a great guy! I'm so glad you have each other. You both deserve someone great - and you both have someone great!

Jen said...

Oh how sweet. What an awesome brother I have! (and sis-in-law too!) Love the pic of him with the hula hoop! :)

Where to start to learn about my transplant!

Thank You for taking the time to read my blog. I am hoping that through this blog and my experiences that I can bring hope, faith and strength to all that may be living with Cystic Fibrosis, CF with Cepacia and Lung Transplant recipients. Information and blog entrees start Nov. 07. My Double Lung Transplant was on Dec. 10th 2007. Please feel free to read about my experience and ask me any questions! My email address is jamiebug77@gmail.com

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My Testimony

It's hard to put into words how I feel toward my Heavenly Father and the Savior. I have so many reasons to be thankful for what I have gone through & endured. Because of my trials in life I have gained a strong testimony of Faith. I have always had Faith in the Lord and in Prayer. As I faced the decision to get a double lung transplant I had to rely on faith to make the choice.....By listening to the spirit, I was guided to Pittsburgh where my life was saved. I believe prayers are answered. I have always tried to follow the philosophy of this: If I do what the Lord expects of me, he will give me what I want & need. That has always worked for me. I Believe in MIRACLES..........My life on this earth is a miracle- I prayed on my knees for years to be healed from my lung disease. I knew that through a priesthood blessing (if it was God's will) I could be healed. So many times I thought he would heal me instantly...my faith was tested as I continued to get sick and no cure was in my future. I turned to prayer....I talked to my Heavenly Father, I cried to him and he heard me and he healed me by guiding me to Pittsburgh and guiding the surgeons hands. I learned humility, and thankfulness. I realized that we need others to lean on and we are supposed to strengthen each others testimonies. I learned that the hardest things we'll do are usually the greatest blessings in our life. I was able to experience a lot of things during surgery and I know I had comforting angels in my ICU room. THe Lord knows each of us by name and he will never leave our side. We need to remember to stay close to him and have Faith that he is watching over us. I know this for a fact! I know that following the gospel will bring us true happiness- the world will tell us otherwise, but I know I am truely happy & living the gospel has brought me that. Amen