So as my previous post mentioned I have started a part time job. I spent a lot of time "thinking" about whether it was something I wanted to do. Being post transplant it seems like every decision I make has to be weighed out on the "How will this effect my lungs?" scale. However, I've gotten to the point where I need something to help me feel like I am contributing.
Post transplant life is awesome 95% of the time. . .seriously. But there is a tiny bit that is hard (it might be more than 5% haha) There are times when I feel lost in a way. It's hard to explain, but I am sure other post transplant patients have probably experienced the feeling. "What Now?" I had dealt emotionally with the probability of my life coming to an end in 2007. I had to be prepared to accept that and so when I got a 2nd chance I feel like I was unprepared. I hadn't really planned that far ahead. It was all "what was happening RIGHT NOW" I dealt with what came at me minute by minute, day by day. Now I think about "what's happening tomorrow. . .next week. . .next month. . next year". . . Because I will live to see those.
It's been almost 4 years. I have done a lot of really cool things. I have my worries, I feel overwhelmed sometimes by my fear of "what if. . ." and my biggest fear of all "rejection", but living in fear is no way really LIVE. Therefore I have overcome those fears by doing things that perhaps my first instinct is to fear them. Which includes "Going Back to WORK". So far I am confident that I have made the right choice! Of course there is always going to be a little fear, but I feel the reward I get from feeling productive and building new relationships will outweigh any fears :)
Save a Life...Be Someone's Hero...
Be An Organ Donor!
Favorite short of the day
1 week ago