I had many, many times in my life where CF through me curve balls. . . I had my share of despair and pain. I will have more. I had times I wanted to give up and times I wished it away. But in retrospect, the things I endured built me up,strengthened, and prepared me for what was ahead of me. If I had avoided all the trial leading up to my transplant I don't think I would have had the strength and determination to endure it. Getting through tough times teaches us. It teaches us things about ourselves and about our abilities beyond what we could have ever learned on our own.
It's really hard to watch others go through pain, and suffering. When people I love are sad, sick or lost. . . it pains me. I 'wish' it away, but then I remember what I was slowly being prepared to do and I know my friends/loved ones are also being prepared for their life. Others' pain and trials can strengthen those around them as well. So I pray not for life to go the way I think or wish it would, but I pray for strength to endure and for others to have strength. I pray for comfort and understanding.
I had a conversation the other day with a girlfriend of mine. As I reflected back on my life and the things I have been taught and the choices I made, I realized all those things make me who I am today. If even just one of them changed, I would have been different. . . I would not have the same life. The good and the bad. We have to love and embrace both. We learn from both. I learned what kind of life I wanted to lead, I wanted religion and spiritual guidance. Sometimes we learn the most from the really hard things and through our mistakes. I have thought about this subject many times throughout my life. I feel that the harder our trials are, the more strength it shows we have because we CAN endure it, we can overcome it! Sometimes we don't do it alone, perhaps we never do it alone. . but we are given the tools and people in our lives to help us along our way. We can find the most strength by letting others help us.
So I guess if this post has any 'message' or point it probably is to not get too discouraged by life. Life is unpredictable and even mean sometimes, but I have Faith that it IS worth it. I heard an interesting comparison the other day. If you believe (like I do), that this life is a test, then this makes perfect sense. Tests are never fun! So why do we expect life to always be fun? Don't misunderstand- I think we can find happiness in all we do, but that means accepting the 'un-fun' stuff too. :) . . .and think how much we learn and how rewarding it is when we pass a really hard test!!!
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