I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears, behold I will heal thee.
2Kings 20:5

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Brutally Honest

So I toured one of the cosmetology schools that I was really leaning on going to. They offered the chance for met to sit through a class one day to see what the school is like. I am SOOOOOO glad I took them up on that. I think every school probably has pro's and con's, is there such thing as a 'perfect' school because every student is different. When the admissions lady called me today, she asked me what I thought. . . . what do I say? I could give her a typical bland review and sugar coat my observations, but what good does that do? So I was honest. I started with what I liked, then what I found discouraging, like how all the students just seemed unprofessional in personal appearance. I mean if you're going into a beauty/fashion kind of career then learning to present yourself that way should be a HUGE priority. The facility/ classroom & break room where boring and un-inspiring. I don't know how any student would feel creative in that space. The instructors all seemed nice and knowledgeable but clientele and walk-ins would be sparse. I want as much opportunity to work with 'actual' people. I didn't really get the impression that any of the students were very 'excited' to be there. Also 10 out of 30 girls just "didn't" show up that day, hmmmmmm, that's concerning. It's nice to be able to have checked it out, and I just don't think its the right fit for my personality. It went against my 'people pleaser' personality to tell them that I thought their program was a disappointment. But I could not bring myself to 'fake' any kind of excitement that I DIDN'T feel while I was there at the school. If more companies get back honest feedback even if it's negative, they should appreciate and learn from it.

So the search goes on, decisions are not being made, my plans are on hold. . .and that's okay because I am moving forward, I am taking life less seriously :) It's my future and I want to make sure I do what is best for me. I have so many options I can still explore. I have many, many interests, so I am confident when I know what IS the right fit I will be ready.

I am working on not worrying about pleasing everyone else. That's more stress than I need to put on myself. I have gone through my entire life worrying about that. Stressed out that I will disappoint other people. . .and frankly it's silly. So what?, not everyone is going to think I am wonderful, I am learning to accept that :)

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Thank You for taking the time to read my blog. I am hoping that through this blog and my experiences that I can bring hope, faith and strength to all that may be living with Cystic Fibrosis, CF with Cepacia and Lung Transplant recipients. Information and blog entrees start Nov. 07. My Double Lung Transplant was on Dec. 10th 2007. Please feel free to read about my experience and ask me any questions! My email address is jamiebug77@gmail.com

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My Testimony

It's hard to put into words how I feel toward my Heavenly Father and the Savior. I have so many reasons to be thankful for what I have gone through & endured. Because of my trials in life I have gained a strong testimony of Faith. I have always had Faith in the Lord and in Prayer. As I faced the decision to get a double lung transplant I had to rely on faith to make the choice.....By listening to the spirit, I was guided to Pittsburgh where my life was saved. I believe prayers are answered. I have always tried to follow the philosophy of this: If I do what the Lord expects of me, he will give me what I want & need. That has always worked for me. I Believe in MIRACLES..........My life on this earth is a miracle- I prayed on my knees for years to be healed from my lung disease. I knew that through a priesthood blessing (if it was God's will) I could be healed. So many times I thought he would heal me instantly...my faith was tested as I continued to get sick and no cure was in my future. I turned to prayer....I talked to my Heavenly Father, I cried to him and he heard me and he healed me by guiding me to Pittsburgh and guiding the surgeons hands. I learned humility, and thankfulness. I realized that we need others to lean on and we are supposed to strengthen each others testimonies. I learned that the hardest things we'll do are usually the greatest blessings in our life. I was able to experience a lot of things during surgery and I know I had comforting angels in my ICU room. THe Lord knows each of us by name and he will never leave our side. We need to remember to stay close to him and have Faith that he is watching over us. I know this for a fact! I know that following the gospel will bring us true happiness- the world will tell us otherwise, but I know I am truely happy & living the gospel has brought me that. Amen