I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears, behold I will heal thee.
2Kings 20:5

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Too much

I am feeling like I have too much to deal with all at once! I am really having a hard time being very excited about anything at all. So much change at one time. It's just too much right now and I am on "system overload". I want to shut down, I want to be angry, I want to scream at someone, I want to make it all go away. . .but I can't. I am scared and excited at once. I am excited for Bryan to get to work in a Harley Shop. . .but that is where it ends. I am not going to pretend that I am looking forward to this move but I know when I have to do what I "NEED" to and not what I "WANT" to. This is obviously what we need to do therefore I will try to make the best of it, but that doesn't take away any of the stress and worries.

Save a Life* Be Someone's Hero* Be an Organ Donor


Pam said...

Oh Jamie, I'm sorry to hear of your distress. Moving is a big deal and it is normal for you to have these feelings. I remember moving once and I cried for three days thinking we made a mistake, but once we were settled in, it was great. Just hang in there, it'll get better. Congrats to Brian and I'll be praying for you both!

Jamie said...

Thanks Pam.....even though it will all work out, you're right it's hard to not stress about the decision.

Where to start to learn about my transplant!

Thank You for taking the time to read my blog. I am hoping that through this blog and my experiences that I can bring hope, faith and strength to all that may be living with Cystic Fibrosis, CF with Cepacia and Lung Transplant recipients. Information and blog entrees start Nov. 07. My Double Lung Transplant was on Dec. 10th 2007. Please feel free to read about my experience and ask me any questions! My email address is jamiebug77@gmail.com

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My Testimony

It's hard to put into words how I feel toward my Heavenly Father and the Savior. I have so many reasons to be thankful for what I have gone through & endured. Because of my trials in life I have gained a strong testimony of Faith. I have always had Faith in the Lord and in Prayer. As I faced the decision to get a double lung transplant I had to rely on faith to make the choice.....By listening to the spirit, I was guided to Pittsburgh where my life was saved. I believe prayers are answered. I have always tried to follow the philosophy of this: If I do what the Lord expects of me, he will give me what I want & need. That has always worked for me. I Believe in MIRACLES..........My life on this earth is a miracle- I prayed on my knees for years to be healed from my lung disease. I knew that through a priesthood blessing (if it was God's will) I could be healed. So many times I thought he would heal me instantly...my faith was tested as I continued to get sick and no cure was in my future. I turned to prayer....I talked to my Heavenly Father, I cried to him and he heard me and he healed me by guiding me to Pittsburgh and guiding the surgeons hands. I learned humility, and thankfulness. I realized that we need others to lean on and we are supposed to strengthen each others testimonies. I learned that the hardest things we'll do are usually the greatest blessings in our life. I was able to experience a lot of things during surgery and I know I had comforting angels in my ICU room. THe Lord knows each of us by name and he will never leave our side. We need to remember to stay close to him and have Faith that he is watching over us. I know this for a fact! I know that following the gospel will bring us true happiness- the world will tell us otherwise, but I know I am truely happy & living the gospel has brought me that. Amen