We all have weaknesses right? I know I do. But how often are we too tough on ourselves? I know I am. I read a post from a friends blog, and it made me stop and think of the things I am too critical about myself. . . .I loved playing with my Barbie when I was a young girl. I actually got it in my head that when I would turn 16 I was going to look like Barbie. . . . as you can imagine, I was sorely disappointed. I was anything BUT. I looked more like Skipper if even that good. Why do we put expectations upon ourselves that are out of our control? I STILL don't look like Barbie and I don't have the money to ever look like her :) But I am not Barbie, I am Jamie, and when they make a "Jamie doll" It will be well. . . . a lot smaller. It will have more scars than Barbie (unless it's Barbie post dog chewing) It will have an imperfect smile, and lots of freckles. It will have A LOT more realistic bust size and waist size and it's hair will come in a variety of colors. What I am saying is I had to accept that I don't have to look like anyone but me. I still haven't mastered it by any means. I get caught up in NEEDING to feel pretty, beautiful, desirable . . . what woman ever stops wanting to feel that way?
I try hard to change/improve on the things that I have control over. I work out to firm my muscle tone, and stay healthy. I can't change where I carry my extra weight, I can however do the work to improve what I can. Some things I can't change without a surgery of some type and frankly I have had enough surgeries for ten lifetimes. Does that mean I just don't care about the things I can't change? No. I still have my "UGLY" days and my "I'm not good enough" days. But I have more "I am amazing" days. Someday hopefully everyday will be an "I am amazing" day, however I am human and we may never feel perfect, because we are not.
Would a flower garden be nearly as beautiful if all the flowers were exactly the same size, kind, color, shape? It would be boring after just a few seconds. Our individuality is what makes us create a beautiful flower garden. So I tell my evil conscience to SHUT UP and enjoy the view.
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2 weeks ago